12 Mar

A note about pride and kids

Pride can be taught without putting someone else down.

As many of you know, my kids are bi-racial. They are Chinese via mom and Puerto Rican via me.

As a Puerto Rican living in NYC, I can’t really tell you which race is the proudest. My parents weren’t the type to hit the Puerto Rican parade every year but they rocked their flags all over the house with pride.

They made an effort of teaching me our traditions but also teaching me to be proud of my heritage. No one could ever take that pride away because my family made sure I appreciated where “they” and where I came from.

When I 1st met my wife, I could tell her family was different.

Pride looks different and that’s ok

note on pride fatherhood is lit

They were Chinese people that weren’t loud about their heritage like my Puerto Rican family.

With my side of the family, you walk into their crib and you know it’s a Spanish household. The food, the smell even the refrigerator magnets scream out Wepppppppppa!

We take being prideful to the next level, but not the Chinese side of the fam. They are more reserved about theirs which has its pluses and negatives.

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Chilling with grandpa Jaime

That side of the family hosts huge gatherings for our special traditions like the last and first dinner of the old year before transitioning to the new year. My kids know how to say Happy New Year and get those red envelopes but they also learned so much about the Chinese side by simply being around the family.

Heck, me being there has afforded me the same luxury. I can tell when a Chinese person is talking smack about me or praising me now lol. It’s the little things. They haven’t taught me any curses yet which is kind of lame but I respect it.

These past few weeks, hate crimes were and still are being committed against Asian Americans. It’s all over the news and the web. You can always find a cornball out there tweeting kung fu virus or some other lame thing because they swear “they” are better.

For some reason, people forgot that the USA isn’t comprised of one superior race, it’s made up of many and they all add value.

I asked my chinse son about it and he had no clue what was going on. Kids barely ever know what is going on but my fear is that maybe he would have felt the wrath of the hate if things were normal. If school was in person again, would one of the students try to hurt him because he is Chinese?

Those are thoughts that I fear the most because just like any other dad, I don’t know what I would do to protect my kids from the hate.

You know what I mean by that because you ALL love your kids just like I do and would do anything to protect them. Someone hurts them, real parents like us are ready to serve our own pain to those who oppose ours.

You hear kids talking about spinning the block on their opps aka the opposition. They take pride in protecting their people just like dads do. I’m pretty sure some of these offenders don’t want the fathers spinning the block in search of who caused their kids or family harm.

Besides protecting them, there is one thing we can do that can help them. That thing is to remind them how great they are regardless of their race or upbringing.

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Grandpa got his WW2 medal after his 100th bday

If your kids are Chinese like my kids are, remind them that Asian Americans like my granddad put their lives on the line to protect our country in WW2. Some lost their lives so we can live freely.

If your kids are Puerto Rican like my kids, remind them that our food makes all the races drool out of control and will add an inch to your waistline while you vibe to some bad bunny or BIG PUN.

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The point is to remind them that people that look like YOU are just as special as those that don’t look like YOU!

My kids no matter the race will add value to our world just like you hope your kids will. It’s on us to start educating them about loving themselves without having to hate the next person.

It starts with us! Kids want to be like the people they are around. If your kids are around you, don’t waste time, teach them empathy but also self-love.

Remind them that the color of someone’s skin, the nationality, none of that matters. What does matter is their actions and we all can decide to do good with those actions or do bad.

Educate and elevate, don’t make the dads spin your block because you did wrong by their people or their kids.

#FatherhoodIsLit and some of us will do ANYTHING and EVERYTHING to protect it. That’s what makes us DOPE FATHERS!

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